How Conspiracy Theories Get Started

A: So this plane was doing aerobatics above the whole time… Me: The aerobatics were a distraction.  It was a spy plane. A: You think they were watching us?  While doing aerobatics?  Really? Me: Oh, they can listen from planes, too. A: Well, they have laser microphones, sure.  But they were doing aerobatics! Me: Gyroscopically […]

Conversations With a Friend, Remembered

Me:  You are so middle-of-the-road, you make the people who paint the lines down the middle of the road, look not-middle-of-the-road. Him:  Yes, but have you ever noticed that those lines in the road are always a little bit to one side or the other? Me:  Yes, they are always to the left of me. […]

Two new additions to the periodic table of elements

Element Name: WOMANIUM Symbol: WO Atomic Weight: (don’t even go there) Physical properties: Generally soft and round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze any time. Melts when treated properly. Very bitter if not used well. Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when […]