A co-worker invited me to his Church the other day. I asked ‘what denomination’, and he said, “Baptist.” Oh, no. I know some Baptists who are great people, but theologically… I’d get along at a Baptist Church like I’d get along at the Democratic National Convention. And for much the same reason. The following is all from a related Facebook conversation:

“The Catholic Church as we know it today did not exist until 590 AD.”

False. The Schism between the Bishop of Rome and the Eastern Bishops, which created the Roman Catholic communion, occurred in 1053 AD.

“Gregory was the first Pope…”

False. Election by the College of Cardinals was established under Nicholaus II, who may be considered the first Pope of the new Roman Catholicism.

“The Church that Jesus started was NOT what the Catholics are.”

True. But it is also not what ANY denomination is today, most assuredly including the Baptists.

“The Catholic Church came out of that church. The REAL Church.”

There is One Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church, which is the body of the Christ. If you mean the ROMAN Catholic Church, then yes; it is one expression which grew from that Church. But it is not SEPARATED FROM that Church.

“Catholics wanted to keep their pagan beliefs, their idols etc.”

^That is just ignorance and spite. The Western (Roman Catholic) and Eastern (Orthodox) Churches split because of differences in language and culture; and specifically over the verbage of the Nicene Creed. The Nicene Creed, by the way, is the statement of faith of Christianity. It should bother you that you call yourself a Christian, and do not know it.

“They also changed how to be “saved”( BUT there still is only one way), memorizing something and being baptized will NOT get you into heaven.”

More ignorance and spite. The Roman Catholic Church teaches no such thing.

“The Bible says you must repent of your sins and ask Jesus to save you.”

Oh? Well, let’s skip over the fact that ‘the Bible’ is an anthology–which actually comes in several versions, with different books. And let’s skip over the fact that “repent and ask Jesus to save you to get into heaven” isn’t in any of those books. Let’s focus on the fact that repentance–and asking–are both WORKS, which you JUST SAID will not save anyone. Please sort that out.

“Mary was just a pure vessel for Jesus to come to this earth by. That is all. She later married Joseph and they had more children. She IS NOT a virgin.”

^Source that for me real quick.

“My father studied this for many years.”

But YOU did not? This is the source of so much trouble in the non-Apostolic communions. Learn for yourself! Is this not important to you?

“Got a lot of the information from very old Catholic history books.”

There is a ‘Catholic history’? I

‘So they themselves know where they really came from.’

Do you mean PRIMARY SOURCE DOCUMENTS? Why don’t you give citations?

And then of course, my favorite from a much earlier conversation:
“Jesus didn’t turn water into wine at a wedding, he turned it into wine vinegar!”

Right. Because Jewish custom had people drinking VINEGAR at weddings. I’m going to the store to buy some vinegar. I’ll watch you drink it and tell me how wonderful it is.

And finally:
“The Baptist Church goes all the way back to John the Baptist!”

Just… Look up the word ‘Essene’ for me, okay?..

Published by Little-Known Blogger

I spent the first years of my life in a trailer park outside of a tiny town in rural Missouri. I grew up to be a long-haired, gun-hating, military-hating, Presbyterian super-liberal. Well, perhaps the “growing up” happened later. While in high school, I was on the cross-country and wrestling teams, and actually won my weight-class in a State powerlifting competition. I went on to attend college on a Bright Flight scholarship, where I promptly became an atheist. I trained for a few years in Shotokan karate and Cheng-system taijiquan before training in my first real martial art, Hwarang-Do, under the late Franklin Fowlkes (later the Founder and Grandmaster of the Five Elements Martial Arts System). I married an older Taiwanese woman my junior year, got divorced in short order, and dropped out of college. After completing my AA in Psychology, I decided I needed a complete change of scenery and joined the U.S. Marine Corps (having early been assured that there was no way that a skinny liberal like me would ever survive Boot Camp). Contrary to what the Hipster Zombies will tell you, this did not “brainwash me into being a Conservative”. Instead, it made me a very unhappy, short-haired liberal, surrounded by guns and the military. However, I spent my whole contract (after schools) on the island of Okinawa, where I was exposed to points of view not dominated by the American liberal media. During this time, I taught ESL classes as a side-job, trained under some of the highest-ranking masters of karate on Okinawa, and discovered the practice of Buddhism. I also spent some time in Korea, where I got to train in hapkido. It was during this period that I came gradually to realize how stupid and evil American liberalism actually is. This was partly due to my Military Police command sending me to Small Arms Instructor school, which gave me more exposure to guns than I could ever have imagined—thus negating my idiotic liberal distaste for them. After the active-duty portion of my Marine Corps contract was over, I worked several jobs, from security contracts to operating a forklift in a warehouse. In 2002, however, when the invasion of Iraq was getting under way, I signed up with the Missouri Army National Guard, and have remained with them since, continuing as a Military Policeman. I am also full-time corrections officer, a member of the Anglican Church, and at one time was an Instructor Candidate in Dekiti-Tirsia Serradas Kali (until my instructor moved away). My hobbies (beyond blogging) include strength training, shooting sports, martial arts, creating digital art, and being a huge science and science-fiction geek.

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